The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him and his family) says: “There are two types of modesty; one is rational modesty, and the other is foolish modesty[1].”
Rational modesty is when a person observes propriety in society and refrains from improper actions.
One might say to someone: “Have some modesty! Don’t throw garbage on the street, don’t bother people, don’t pour dirty and foul water into the street, don’t cause trouble for others…” This type of modesty is praiseworthy and based on reason. However, foolish modesty is when someone tells their child: “Go to your uncle’s house to congratulate him for the holiday,” and the child responds, “I feel embarrassed. I am too shy.” This is what we call foolish modesty.
Considering that many personality issues stem from childhood, what should be done to help children overcome this foolish modesty?
To address this type of modesty, it is essential to revive and promote group games. Parents should encourage their children to socialize with other kids, to move enthusiastically, and play with their peers. As a result, the veil of foolish modesty, which is a form of inner passivity and signifies weakness, will be lifted. This way, children are prepared for social life. Group sports are beneficial even for those who are interested in public speaking and addressing audiences. Shyness does not allow such opportunities. Group activities provide an ideal environment to overcome shyness. When children bond with one another, they can share spiritual values alongside games and sports, and express their thoughts openly. This practice serves as training for speaking in social settings.
These days, with children spending more time at home due to the COVID-19 pandemic, we must be vigilant so that the “virus” of shyness and timidity does not take hold of them. By observing health protocols, we should make the best use of shared time together. Family activities, such as parents playing with their children, are especially recommended. Once this disease is under control, social interactions, children’s games, and sports should be quickly revived and re-established.
(Taken from the book *Goals of Physical Education and Educational Perspectives in Islam*, by the late Ayatollah Sheikh Mohammad Taqi Falsafi, with modifications and additions)
Tags: ethics – modesty – the Prophet
Footnote:
[1] Al-Kafi, Vol. 2, Page 106